every beat of my heart

Friday, February 29, 2008

rawr.

i detest moe. when are result gonna come out?!?!?!

argh. the anticipation feeling doesn't exactly rock.

ever since the middle of february when everyone begun rumouring the release of results, it's like as though you're plucking up all your courage and bracing yourself for that moment. and now it's the end of feb. i feel deflated. blah. it's suppose to come out today!! but nope! no news about it. not a single word the moe said. hello!! it's already coming to march! last night when i opened the letter from NTU, guess wad i saw in bold. haha! Congratulations on your A level results! ha ha. surely it's out already and there's anything to be congratulated about. grr.

argh. hate this kind of waiting. it's terrible, makes one miserable. esp when one doesn't have the confidence in doing really well.. and esp when everything would rise and fall with the knowledge of the results. boo.

well at least i can take my mind off this while i enjoy my march? hopefully.
2mar: vertical marathon
8mar: race with jud, ntu openhouse
15 mar: nus openhouse
16 mar: xphysique
my march weekends are burnt. (:

den comes april,
5apr: hc 'reunion'
7apr: SOT commences!!
well i'm excited about going to bible school.! if i get in that iz. roar.

i still feel like heading out. let down my hair, relax, go crazy.

*throbs @09:14
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Tuesday, February 26, 2008

whee (:

wheE (:
whEE (:
wHEE (:
WHEE (:

waha (: happy cuz someone gave me an angel 0=) waha! well all that needs to be said has been said. right? waha! THANKS FOR THE NIGHT OUT! (: i dunno why but i always like going out with my fav senior (: maybe cuz he has a car. wahaha no la.. whenever i tink of the car i tink of jud and serene (: anyways.. it's cuz he's a ball of fun. fullstop. dun care wad others judge or say, juz know it. well.. i'd say he's successful! though he still says there's room for improvement.. (which is the biggest room ever) but take heart, you're only TWENTY. okay la 20 in advance :p

so yeah. watched juno (: was about teenage pregnancy. i guess the part that caught my attention was when her parents actually accepted her pregnancy and supported her all the way. and even though the mum was a stepmum, she even verbally abused that ultarsound technician cuz she kinda 'insulted' her being a teenage mum :D waha! okay though most of the time i was trying to figure out wad the characters were saying, i enjoyed the movie and i enjoyed myself! (:

after movie, arvin drove past the flyer!!! i mean the singapore flyer. :D it was nice. but haha! going round and round in the carpark was funny :p oh well! ohoh.. and i juz cant help but giggle to myself everytime i tink back when i say smth lame and arvin would juz 'NUT' me back to reality. HAHA! =X

now i can say i've tried half the selections of cheesecakes at secret recipe (:

blah. babble babble babble.
oh yes, olivia is good. her vocals rock (: not oli cho, this lady sings jazzy tunes.

yupp..
i know i'm not suppose to be doing this but i cant help it. i juz keep building little mini sandcastles in the sky. sigh. watched the long-awaited 'just like heaven' with my mum on dvd in bed. now i know how it feels to be a couch potato. glued to the bed watching rented(or purchased) dvds. sigh!! back to reality nothing of such can ever happen. reading and knowing and realising that that empty gap cannot be filled by a guy but by only God. thanks twin serene for your book. i'm only at the first chapter and hey, no more feminist views ok! ahh! sometimes ignorance is bliss? but when you know it, you just cant help but to accept it and at the same time wishing that you still could live in your own make-believe. BAH!

that's it.
i'm going back to reading.

til i update my little dead blog again! :D

*throbs @14:38
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Friday, February 22, 2008

SINGAPORE WON!!! :D

okay. that's all for this entry :p

*throbs @12:17
0 <3

Thursday, February 21, 2008

strength of a man + random ramblings

The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
It's seen in the width of his arms that circles you.
The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
It is in the gentle words he whispers.
The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
It's how good a buddy he is with his or "your" children.
The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work.
It's in how he is respected at home.
The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
It's in how tender he touches.
The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest.
It's in his heart... that lies within his chest.
The strength of a man isn't in how many women he's loved.
It's in how true he can be to the ONE woman he's trying to love.
The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
It's in the burdens he can carry.
The strength of a man isn't in how much food he eats from your table.
It's in the effort he puts forth when you are unable.
The strength of a man isn't in how he makes love.
It's in the understanding that there is more to making love than making love.
-Author Unknown-

aww. okay i koped it from serene. so there you have it!! it's cited and no plagurism!! :D reminds me of pw. bah!! anyways.. was toched by it when pst tan shared this with us last weekend. it kinda never occured to me to find it online but there you have it! THANKS TO MY BELOVED TWIN! (:

so yeah. today's the day singapore will find out if she's going to win that bid for the youth olympics or not. i'm hoping she wins!! cuz we never had such events before. and it's sure going to be a GREAT MEGA thing. yeah! (;

anyway, nut iz back to reading. bahaha! whether you like it or not. :p it's getting really boring in office. kinda like dreading work every day. hoping that the next day i can take MC or smth. but nope! being goody-two-shoes i'm back at work every other day. boss is going overseas next week. from like monday to thursday. so i borrowed two books from NLB and i intend to read in office since i kinda dun have anything to do. bleh.

haven been doing much these days to update. only know that results are coming out soon and i'm not looking forwards to it. i really dunno wad to expect. deep inside of me there is always this intuition that i'm not going to do well. sigh. results out den say! until den i'm going to be =)!

so i've decided to sign up for SOT. but i still haven decided to go overseas or not. in a way honestly i still want to go overseas. the sooner the better, but i really cant bare to leave. everything else is back here. people to see, things to do, responsibilites. yet in local uni i wouldnt know what to do. psychology? business? i'm going to fill up the SSC scholarship form. thanks chuan for sending it to me. here's the link if you're interested.. www.ssc.gov.sg/scholarship. do sign up asap cuz submission ends 14March! well whether i'll submit them or not it depends on my results.

the first thing i'll do when i take back my results is cry.
the second thing will be to drown.

*throbs @17:23
0 <3

Thursday, February 14, 2008

happy valentine's day.

HAPPY V DAY HAPPY V DAY HAPPY V DAY!!
NOT.

pfft. someone date me out pleaseeeeeeeeee!!! AH! nvm. i shall stick out at home and BOYCOTT v day. bah!

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ALL CELEBRATING THIS ERM COMMERICALISE SPECIAL DAY! (:

i'm still working and i cant believe it, my boss is going to continue with the meeting this afternoon like later and it's still VDAY afterall.. grr.

anyway, i was thinking about this for quite some time already.. it's kinda been bugging me for a very long while.. so if anyone has a reply to this please please please enlighten me ok? i'm sure you should have my contact.. plus i so do need to do lots of catching up with peeps.. x)
ya. back to my point. what's exactly the difference between loving someone as your brother and loving someone as smth more than a friend? hmmm. mind boggling :D

geex.
watched 27 dresses on monday. wasnt exactly the people i'd want to watch a romance comedy with. probably half the time those two people beside me couldnt understand half wad the show was saying. didnt get to de-stress as much as i thought i would with a movie. i wished i had enjoyed the show more!!!!! ):
well 27 dresses. learnt one thing in the show iz that you have to be yourself to really get what you want. there's not much point in pretending that you are someone else and trying to achieve wad you really want. then comes the question, do you really know who you are?
the show's kinda like a roller coaster ride. ups and downs all over the place throughout the show. too many moments of wanting to tear den anti-climax. but i feel it's very much like how life is.. ups and downs and all. but most of all, the decisions we make in rage or anger or even sadness and pain could really hurt. i could feel the pain. seriously. sometimes you just feel like the moment never ends, but something would juz pop out to spoil it all. sigh i dunno wad to say.. the story is kinda just so true.

Jane feeling so much pain yet not able to confide to anyone. den she gets to let down her hair and scream her heart out. yes. scream your heart out. now i feel like hitting the dancefloor.
Jane having to do it just for the sake of not disappointing others and since it's always so difficult to say no.

Jane feeling so miserable at herself, and helping others becomes an outlet for her.

I love Jane's busy schedule.
maybe i could reconsider being a wedding planner in future.nwyt cheesecake? choices decisions. sigh.

love is patient, love is kind..
love is the one thing that makes you lose your mind.

*throbs @12:34
0 <3

Monday, February 11, 2008

happy cny.

oh no.
i'm back.
resurrecting my blog yet again.
back to another kinda gonna be emo post.
SIGH!!

but first,
HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR TO ONE AND ALL! (:
face it. cny is losing its essence as we all start growing up a little older each year....
focus of cny has turned to gambling, a time to con relatives of money. kinda still prefer heading to my grandma's every sunday. at least the sincerity would be there.. guess it's still good that cny works as a form of gathering of all the 'long-lost' relative who juz aint that distant.
oh well.. i still like cny at my place. (: the sound of happy talking voices (: and cny house hopping!! (: baha! hophophop it's really fun :D and yes, the common factor: happy talking voices and laughter! (:

talking bout house hopping, we house hopped on saturday!! (: like soda, jud, jon, dt, me, rae's! (: baha it's alot of places. and the first time i'm setting foot at jud's and soda's! bleh! well and 2nd to dt's and jon's x) baha!! we'll house hop again next year or smth if possible yea! (:

oh and not forgetting our mini track gathering at yL's oh so big house!! :D bah! happy chinese birthday yL! (: the cake was yummily sinful! and jon jud and arvin came late. bleh! at least captain was there!! x) had a little reliving track moments with videos and all.. baha i'm expecting alot of new additions into facebook! pebbles! i miss track. arvin says to go back for training soon one day. after i finish this job yes!! i so want to go back for training!! :p seriously after junking all that goodies, getting fat! n-e-e-d--t-o--s-t-a-r-t--t-r-a-i-n-i-n-g. and so now mr arvin tang owes us movie outings AND ice skating outings. baha! i know you read this blog so here is a gentle reminder for you :D

baha so i guess that's all for cny.

pre-cny ended with jon jud and i tanning at changi rise for 4hours all because of daryltanweikeong! baha yes your fault! blame the NSguy :p well had heaps of fun in the cold water and scorching floor under the burning sun.. i'm dark now! but not as dark as jud :p lupping on loads of moisturisers and back at work in the aircon room. GEEX. i'm sad i missed the OAKLEY job opportunity!! ): i wan free sunglasses. roar

okay this post is not so emo afterall..
oh well..
lots of things to think about!
i rest my peace.

and to you know who you are,
dun be sad and lonely k!!! cuz erm you'll never be lonely alone? no la. i'm here to be bugged. and remember a sms you sent last last time? i still have it in my phone!! :D it says....
"when you're down, think of happy things around you. Cheer up always :-) rmb there's ppl around you who wants you to be happy!"

yea, there's ppl around you who wants you to be happy! (:

*throbs @12:31
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